August 16, 2016
Hey guys! This is a really old interview I did back when KoP first came out. (See how simple and quaint and vague it is?! Back before I felt I could reveal anything for fear of spoilers!) I feel old just reading it again, but since we have so many new people joining us today, I figure I'll share it again!
Today I’ve had the pleasure of managing to fit all of the primary point of view egos in Kings or Pawns into one room for a unique, round-table character interview! We have Jikun, general of the elven nation’s army; Hairem, king of the elven nation; Alvena, a palace servant; and Sellemar, the mysterious foreigner.
JJ Sherwood: King Hairem, I apologize for throwing you in with this egotistical lot—I suppose General Jikun and Sellemar manage such an excess of the quality that it seems to bleed onto others. What is one of YOUR negative qualities and do you feel that Jikun and/or Sellemar brought out said quality in the novel?
Hairem: It took me a while to realize this truth: I am quite naïve. Far more naïve than I’d like to believe. *laughs* And yes, I believe that Jikun and Sellemar both highlighted this quality of mine not only by their words, but by their actions. They clearly have had far more experience to a side of life I suppose I’ve been rather sheltered from.
Sellemar: Need I point out that he realized that far too late?
JJ Sherwood: (ignores Sellemar*) Very perceptive, Your Majesty. Now let’s turn to your handmaid, Alvena, for the next question.
Sellemar: Oh come now, JJ. The girl is mute.
JJ Sherwood: Alvena, you contrast the characters greatly in the novel not only by your youth, but by your station. Do you feel that you could have changed certain events if you have been of another societal rank? What rank would you choose?
Alvena: *nods head vigorously* *gestures to head* *fans self dramatically* *looks adoringly at the king*
JJ Sherwood: I wouldn’t mind being a queen, myself.
Jikun: You only knew what she meant because every woman says such nonsense.
Alvena: *kicks Jikun’s shins beneath the table.*
JJ Sherwood: AHEM. This one is for you, Sellemar. If you could have selected any member of the primary cast to go on your next journey with you, who would you choose?
Sellemar: …Well that is like asking me if I would rather be eaten by a bear or a drake.
Hairem: Well, I can’t blame him for not choosing me, now can I…? Heh.
JJ Sherwood: You have to answer the question, Sellemar.
Sellemar: *sighs* Navon.
Hairem: A necromancer?
Sellemar: Yes. He is the most rational, experienced, and tolerable of the lot. I do not expect I would emerge any safer, but at least I would not have to keep him under constant surveillance.
JJ Sherwood: Arrogant, but probably true.
Alvena: *kicks JJ’s shins*
JJ Sherwood: Ow!
Jikun: Not so humorous when it happens to you, is it?
JJ Sherwood: *flushes* Thank you, Sellemar. NOW we get to you, Jikun. What is your favorite color?
Jikun: Excuse me, but what totally useless nonsense did you just ask me?
JJ Sherwood: I believe I asked you before the interview if you could hold your “uncouth tongue” in check and you stated: “Certainly. If you don’t want me to do the interview.” So you are honored with a safe question. Now, what is your favorite color?
Jikun: The deepest hues of a woman’s vag—
JJ Sherwood: ANNNND I know where this is going!
Sellemar: Can I strike him now?
Alvena: *nods vigorously*
Jikun: *chair slides back* Gods, I don't know why I both joining these ridiculous discussions.
Hairem: He's only behaving so ghastly to get a rise out of you. If you don't respond... Sellemar, lower your fist and sit back down, you're only encouraging him!
JJ Sherwood: T-that’ll be all, folks! Thank you for joining us today!
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