August 26, 2016
Ok, so Sellemar and Itirel have returned from a break in our interview—mostly for Sellemar to cool off. If you missed the first half, you can find it here, on the amazing and kickass blog: David’s Book Blurg.
JJ: So let’s continue. We last left off touching on Sellemar’s lack-of-romance. So Itirel, have you ever been in love?
Itirel: *smiles fondly* Indeed I have been—to the most magnificent woman that Ilra saw fit to touch this earth with. However, we were married for but a breath. Her grace and wisdom had no place in the mortal realm. And before you begin to lament, JJ, please withhold your sorrows. Her memory would not be served well with anything less than joy. A minute with her was a lifetime. And Ilra allowed me years. I bear no sorrow and it would not do you well to mourn in my stead.
JJ: Wow, ok, well, your fancy speech doesn’t make it any easier, just so you know. So let’s totally change the topic here. You need to warn me next time! Ok, so: Sellemar, this one is from the editor: What is your daily exercise routine?
Sellemar: I begin the morning early, no later than dawn, and— *continues rambling*
JJ: *whispers* He has no clue that the editor was hitting on him again, does he?
Itirel: What do you think?
JJ: *giggles*Ok, well while he’s distracted, describe his most embarrassing moment. I asked him this in another interview and he made a fool out of me!
Itirel: Ah, well, in your experience with him, how skilled a liar is Sellemar?
JJ: The worst.
JJ: Wait…what are you saying? …Are you saying that story is TRUE?!
Itirel: Granted, that was many years ago, but Sellemar, myself, and our companions had just taken an enormous victory. We returned home to celebrate and—
Sellemar: You are not listeni—wait.
Itirel: —Sellemar found the wine most appealing—
Sellemar: What in Sel’ari’s name are you saying?
Itirel: —and he drank like a dwarf on… well, any day of the year—
Sellemar: *frantically tries to cover Itirel’s mouth*
Itirel: *pries Sellemar’s hand free with ease* And so we witnessed him, gaily prancing down the road like a fawn in spring; and indeed, it was there that later we found him, sprawled out, naked as the day he was birthed: lying in the public fountain.
JJ: *laughs* Oh man, that’s definitely more embarrassing than anything I’ve done.
JJ: Here, we’ll give him a moment to recover. It’s so much easier to torment him with you around. Itirel, I’ve gotta ask: what is up with your horses? I mean, when you guys were with Erallus, you two dismounted and away your horses went, taking his with. Where did they go??
Itirel: Ah, that is the difference between beasts affected by corruption and those who have not been. Surely you noted, in Heroes or Thieves, the way the beasts of the canyon behaved as opposed to those elsewhere: frightened, cautious, feral. When the world grows corrupt, it affects all creatures on Aersadore. Sellemar’s steed and my own are from Ryekarayn, wild horses from the valleys west of Mythowood. They have not lost their “magic” as it were—their wisdom and sentience. Though their intelligence is less (by objective potential) than that of humanoid beasts, we can communicate with them much like we could a young child. Thus, when we entered the True Blood tunnel, our horses knew to return to the safety of the city and await our return.
JJ: I want a horse like that! I’ve got a baby mule, though, and maybe that’s all the intelligence I can handle… Sellemar, how are you doing? You look like you’ve collected yourself.
Sellemar: Shut up.
JJ: Damn you two are so different. Hahaha. Ok, second to last question, in order please: Sellemar, what are Itirel’s worst traits? Itirel, same question, but about Sellemar.
Sellemar: Itirel does not have a great number of faults. He is a wise and—
JJ: I’m going to ask you to list his positive traits next, so PLEASE just answer!
Sellemar: …Alright. When my mother was still alive, it was as though I had two of them. He is constantly fretting about what I should eat, how long I have been in the sun, how much sleep I have had—or the lack thereof—and whatever other maternal traits one can imagine.
Itirel: Why, those were not negative at all.
Itirel: My turn? Ah, well, let me see. Sellemar is rash. Proud. Arrogant. Quick to temper and to judge.
JJ: Ok, now ease up on one another and finish this interview as friends should: tell me the best things about one another!
Sellemar: *smiles slightly* Itirel is as wise as he is compassionate. He is selfless… perhaps to a fault but… I admit to fully admiring it. He is humble—no elf before can possibly match the way he carries himself in that regard. It is not so humble that I find him annoying, however, and that in itself is relief. And Itirel is calm—in the chaos of this age, he can somehow step outside of its influences and rationally determine the course of all actions. Lastly, he is loyal and honest—two traits that are immeasurable and yet I say that he is overflowing in both.
Itirel: Why, thank you for that generosity, Sellemar. Now let me see…
Itirel: *smiles* Sellemar is courageous, just, kind—not to be mistaken with “nice,” selfless, honest—or so inept at lying that he remains so—optimistic, sympathetic, prudent, responsible, studious, sober, organized, precise, self-denying, protective, principled, steadfast, loyal, resourceful, realistic, punctual, passionate, steadfast, patriotic, skillful, thorough, upright—
JJ: …Er, that’s good, that’s good. Heh. Thank you, Itirel. And thank you, Sellemar.
Sellemar: No I look extremely ungenerous in my response.
Itirel: This is not a competition.
Itirel: But if it was, you would win of course.
Sellemar: *mildly satisfied*
JJ: I hope to have you two by again! So much more to learn about the both of you! We will see what Gods or Men has in store for you next!
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